Broken (The Outsiders Series) Read online

  “Anne Marie,” Ryan says, “this is Carter. He’s new here and he’s a junior like us.” He walks over to Colton to congratulate his success, and I’m left having a staring contest with Anne Marie.

  Finally, she speaks. “Welcome to the group,” she says with a shrug. Well, that was easier than expected. And when Colton reaches around to introduce himself, I figure that this was all of it. Nothing like my other school, with the hazing and embarrassing tests.

  3

  By the time I got through Creative Writing, I was exhausted. The teacher had us writing poetry, Haikus to be exact. I’ve always liked poetry, but he kept trying to force us to write about the trees outside the window. I never like when teachers try to force inspiration on you, but I think that the kids in this class were all forced into it. He kept comparing us to his other classes, saying that we lacked written expression and stuff. The guy was just a bastard, in my opinion, and there was no way anyone would work for someone like him. If we were in the real world, we would have quit that job by now.

  I step out into the hallway after he tells us that we have to write a Haiku about something that haunts us. Most of the kids snickered and joked about monsters under their beds. They have no idea what a monster can be. And by the time I get to my last class, after attempting to find a bathroom, I’m right on time. And Mr. Preston makes sure that I know that. After handing me back my schedule, he puts me in a seat in the very back of the room, but I can’t blame him because it’s the only one left.

  I look around the room. This class is set up in rows. It’s different from the groups in Creative Writing. Something about the normalcy comforts me. But it could just be because I’m out of Creative Writing. Ryan was right about that class. He told me it sucked balls. I just didn’t think he was serious.

  “Mr. Daniels,” Mr. Preston says. By the tone of his voice, I can tell that he’s said my name more than once. Great, now I’ve already looked stupid in front of everyone.

  I look up at him and apologize to the background of snickers and amused looks. I catch Anne Marie’s eye. She sits in the front corner. Her blonde hair is now in a high ponytail. She winks at me before turning around.

  “I was just saying that you came just in time for our self-discovery project. They already chose partners yesterday, but we had an absent student so you can partner with her. Does that suit your interests, Mr. Daniels?”

  “That’s fine, sir. Thank you.” I look back down and stare at my fingers. I wonder if the girl is someone I already know but don’t have time to think about it because a piece of paper is pushed on my desk. The student in front of me nods when I catch his eyes. He smiles sadly at me before turning back around.

  “Now class, let’s go over the basic parameters of this project. This is your semester project. You have the entire month to complete this, so if you do not finish before winter break, kids, you will have to meet your partner over the holidays. Do you understand?” We all mumble assent, and he continues after running his hand through his long, blonde hair. He looks like someone from a surfing magazine. If he taught at my old school, he would have been harassed by all of the girls. But that doesn’t seem to be a problem here – at least, not in this class.

  “The first part is your own introduction. We will be working on these today only. You must answer the questions written on your paper. And no, Leanne, I do not just want you to write the number and your answers. I want you to tell me a story or offer me an expository. You have learned about these types of essays for two and a half years, guys. You can do this, okay? All you have to do is try to do it.”

  Anne Marie raises her hand suddenly. “Mr. Preston, does it smell like onions in here to you?” she asks as she sniffs the air.

  The kids around me all laugh and snort.

  “Anne Marie, this is no time to worry about whether you should be chewing gum or not,” Mr. Preston fires back.

  This time the entire class bursts out in simultaneous laughter. I mentally high-five the coolest teacher ever and join in. Anne Marie deserved that for trying to ruin the class’ concentration.

  “Since I can tell you’re all off task now, I’ll let you work on your current autobiography. Make sure that you answer all of the questions and please write in complete sentences. I do not want this typed, and you all know the consequences of bringing me a typed paper; if you want your mom and dad to do it, force them to sit at the table with you. It will let you all bond.”

  The kid in front of me ducks his head, and I’m thinking it was him. I wonder what his consequence was then. And, like he knew what I was thinking, he turns around. “Hey, I feel bad for you, man. You didn’t deserve it.”

  I wrinkle my brow. “Didn’t deserve what?”

  “Getting paired up with Vandelya. You won’t like her at all. Not if you hang around Anne Marie.” He shrugs and turns back around. I look at the back of his dark colored head. His hair curls at the ends and he wears it in front of his eyes so that I can’t see him that well. He doesn’t shave either, and his almost-beard is coming in unevenly. He seems a little off, though. And I don’t know what to make of it.

  And instead of tapping his shoulder or making a noise to get his attention, I look down at the paper in front of me. I borrowed an extra notebook of Ryan’s when he told me that my Creative Writing teacher wouldn’t take the excuse. The blank paper calls to me, drawing out ideas of my past. And I have a decision to make. Tell the truth about myself. Or lie. I sit there, drawing faces and lines on my paper for a while. It’s Mr. Preston that finally forces me to make my decision.

  “You’re getting a lot of work done, Carter. Do you want to read it in front of the class later on?” he asks as he looks down at my drawings. Then, he lowers himself so that he’s on my level. “You have the power to write down anything you want to. Just tell us who you are, Carter. Then, they won’t keep guessing. They’ll know you, just like they all know each other.”

  My first thought is: why do I want them to know me? And then, just like that, I know that I want to make it all up. If I’m forced to work with someone that I don’t know, I’m going to make it interesting for both of us.

  I glance at the first question before starting with my name and date of birth. I work on creating a story with two loving and hardworking parents. One of them works in investment banking while the other claims to be a detective of sorts. I go into detail about my dad’s long hours. Then, I add the piece about how I think he’s a spy or something like that. Maybe even a CIA agent. I add information about my childhood. I traveled to Europe when I was younger. That’s why I started school late. And this story is better than the one I told the woman when I registered. I’m keeping this one.

  I kept writing about how the kids at my old high school wanted to vote me prom king, but I was dethroned because I wasn’t the prom queen’s boyfriend. My parents haven’t bought me a new car because, ever since my accident, they don’t trust me at all. And it just goes on and on. And part of me believes the lies, because I want them to be the truth. I want them to be real. Because it’s better than what I have right now.

  When the bell rings, I look up to see that kids are packing up to leave. I shove my fake life into my pocket and hand Ryan his notebook on the way out of the room. We walk outside together, and it doesn’t take me long to realize that he’s quieter than usual.

  “Hey, man, what’s up?” I ask as we step into the hallway. He turns to look at me. Then he looks away again. “Seriously, Ryan,” I add, “you can talk to me about it, man.” And as soon of the words fall out of my mouth, I mentally slap myself. Now I’m going to be forced to tell him things about myself.

  “I don’t want you to tell Anne Marie or someone, Carter. And who knows what you’ll do now that you’re one of us,” he admits.

  I might as well play the friend card. Who knows what these people are really like here. And if I’m involved, I’m going to need at least one friend. Ryan’s my best option. He isn’t as touchy-feely as Todd. “You’re the reason that I’m one of you,” I say. “I’m loyal to you first. So, what’s up? Why you so quiet?”

  Ryan kicks the soft dirt as we step outside. He shoves his hands in his pockets and shrugs before taking a deep breath. “Turns out that Todd’s lassie is Katie. I found out after lunch. I guess I should’ve known it. Todd kinda stopped being my friend, and Katie wouldn’t really do nothing with me anymore and stuff. Turns out she was getting some from my friend.”

  Wow. This is like my old school. I can’t believe the amount of drama that surrounds the popular people, and I almost want to tell him this, but I keep it inside. This isn’t what Ryan wants to hear right now. Ryan needs a good guy talk, and I need to be there for him. What can I say? I get raised by parents who don’t care, so it makes me care that much more. I don’t want to hurt people the way I’ve been hurt. And if he’s the guy I choose to be my friend, I’ve got to be myself – more or less – with him.

  “Ryan,” I say after a few seconds, “why don’t you walk home with me now? My parents got me an apartment nearby. And you can get someone to pick you up later. You shouldn’t ride the bus with them.”

  Ryan’s eyes grow large. “Your parents got you an apartment?” he asks seriously. “What? They didn’t want your parties to ruin their house or something?” He laughs and claps my back. “Dude, you are awesome!”

  I laugh with him, pretending that it is true, that I was lucky enough to have parents that were this lenient. Inside, though, I know that I’d take crazy, overprotective parents any day. It would be better than what I’ve got.

  “So where’s your car?” Ryan asks as we walk past the parking lot.

  I scratch my head. “Got in a crash a while ago and they haven’t bought me a new one yet. Something about trust issues.”
br />   “Yeah,” Ryan says as we stop at the crosswalk. “My dad won’t give me one till I’m eighteen.”

  I nod, and we walk without talking for a few minutes.

  “Carter,” Ryan says as we pass the gas station near my apartment, “I think you’ll be my new best friend.” He claps my back again and laughs. Maybe I was wrong about the touchy-feely stuff. Maybe they’re all like that here. I guess I’ve got to get used to it or something.

  “Man, I want a drink,” he adds a second later. “Bet your parents don’t want you drinking, though. No parent is that awesome. Besides, we don’t drink much in this town. We go to church and pray and all that worship stuff.”

  “Don’t get me thinking I’m in the middle of Footloose, man.”

  Ryan laughs. “Hey, that girl was pretty hot – in the new one, I mean. I’d take her home, for sure.” After he finishes that statement, he gets quiet again. I let him think about it for a while.

  “You know,” he says after a couple minutes. “I think the worst part is that Todd’s my friend and all. I didn’t think it was her.”

  “He wasn’t your friend, Ryan. You know that he wasn’t. And you should be angry at both of them for keeping it from you. How did you find out, anyway?”

  “Katie and I usually sneak off during fourth. She’s got PE and I’ve got Art. I got a text from her, telling me to meet her out by the lockers. I think she sent it to the wrong person, because they were both surprised to see me.” He shrugs.

  “Ouch, man. What’d you do?” I ask.

  “I just walked away, Carter. I couldn’t let them see me blow up, and I couldn’t let them see me cry.”

  I nod and look over at Ryan. He’s kind of like me, with dark hair and dark eyes. He wears his in a faux hawk, though. It doesn’t really match his collared shirt, but it works for him. He seems to have a lot in common with me, even though our problems aren’t really of the same magnitude. But it’s still the same principle. Betrayal by someone you care about. In his case, two. It might even be worse to have it that way. Hell, if Jack had been my real father, I would have been worse off.

  “Not that I would cry over a thing like that,” Ryan adds a minute later. He rubs the back of his head and lets out a nervous laugh. Then, he glances sideways at me. “You know what I mean.”

  I nod. “I won’t say anything, man. I’m not into betrayal. I know too much about its grasp.”

  Ryan looks up as we turn the corner into my apartment complex. It isn’t the nicest place. I mean, I don’t have a lot of money left. But the guy at the desk told me that he knew of a few jobs. And he let me stay for free this month; he said it wasn’t fair to take a kid’s money. Especially when neither of us knew when I would be getting more of it. It was a nice gesture, and it made me stay here. If this town was full of the people in Atlanta, I would’ve been kicked out for telling them that I didn’t have a job. So I’d take what I could get.

  Ryan clears his throat, interrupting my thoughts. “This place ain’t bad, Carter. And I’m sorry for getting all heavy on you. I swear I ain’t looking for a bromance or nothing. K? Friends?” Ryan asks as he holds out his hand. He smiles and winks at me jokingly.

  I laugh and take his hand in mine so we can shake on it. “Yeah, man. Friends.”

  “Now let’s go up and see what you got up here, man. You got furniture and junk in there already?” he asks as he jogs up the stairs.

  “The place came furnished,” I say as we head up to my apartment.

  4

  The next day drags on. World History is kind of interesting. The teacher, Dr. Roberts, lectures all period. But he does a good job of making it fun. It’s like he’s telling us a story, the way he turns it all into one big soap opera. And I actually listened. History has never been my best subject. But my old teachers made it all about dates and wars and stuff. They never told us about the people’s lives. They didn’t explain why they made their decisions. Dr. Roberts does.

  After World History, I’ve got Chemistry with Ms. Davis. She lets me sit with Ryan and Todd, even though she always makes kids sit in alphabetical order; it’s because they started doing more of their work when I got there. I didn’t really believe it at first, but when I saw a few of their papers passed back, I figured out it was true. They really did have pretty bad grades. And the work she gives us is so easy. I wonder why they don’t do it.

  Sometimes, I wonder why I do so well in school. It’s probably because it was the only thing that kept me from kicking Jack’s ass. Focusing on something more important and bigger than my home life helped. And I guess that Ryan and Todd figured school was better than facing each other. The silence between them was weird, especially when compared to yesterday, and I had to tell them to stop asking me to be their messenger. Ryan felt bad about it, but I don’t think Todd did. He seems like someone that belongs with Anne Marie, not Katie. Someone needs to tell him that he ain’t some god amongst us teens. Maybe I will, if it comes to that.

  And on top of all of that, Eli abandoned us. He didn’t sit with us in the lunch room yesterday. He sat with the other football players and all. And that’s who he sat with in class today. So I was pretty much alone with the two worst Chemistry partners ever. Good thing my school had us take Chemistry in eighth grade too, because I would’ve been lost coming in this late. But I’ve been balancing equations for a while. The bad thing was that I had to entertain myself when I was done. All I did was draw on my paper and think about all the lies.

  Yesterday, I told Ryan all my lies. Turns out, he told everyone else. Cause I kept getting asked about my family. And it was fun, pretending that my parents were important and stuff. It was fun pretending that I was important.

  When I walk into the lunch room, I see Anne Marie and Katie laughing with Todd and Colton. They make their way to the back of the line, and when I look at the big eleven on the screen, I realize that juniors eat first today. For some reason, that makes me excited, and I walk over to Ryan and grab him so that we can get in a different line.

  “Dude,” Ryan whispers, “I can’t believe they’re so cool about the whole thing.” He looks through a few people to spy on Katie and Todd. They’re all over each other.

  “Ryan, man, she’s just a slut. You need to get over her. There are all kinds of other girls. Why don’t you take your chances with Candy,” I suggest as I spot her walking in. Today, she’s got on a tight black dress and nasty stripper heels. Her pink hair has a black streak in it, and she’s smacking on bubble gum like it’s the best thing in the world. Girls are so weird about getting attention sometimes.

  “Hm,” Ryan says with a tilt of his head. “It might make things more interesting for me. You know, Katie always hated Candy.” He elbows me and wags his eyebrows. “You know, since she’s rumored to be the best girl at the school.”

  I shrug. “I guess nothing’s better than revenge. So go ahead and talk to her.” I push Ryan out of the lunch line but he comes right back. He shakes his head and a nervous laugh escapes his mouth.

  “Nah, Carter. I ain’t that cool.” He rubs the back of his head and shoves his hands in his pockets. Then, he leans over and whispers in my ear. “I didn’t tell anyone this, but Katie was my first and all. Candy would just tell the whole school about it. And then I wouldn’t get any girl until college. By then,” he says with a large wave of his hand, “I’ll be too scared to try it another time, and I’ll die all alone.”

  I laugh. “Ryan, for a cool guy, you think too much. Come on, let’s grab our lunch and talk about something other than girls.”

  We grab our food as we walk through the lunch line. It’s some weird looking stuffed crust pizza and some green beans. The two don’t really go together, but ketchup stopped being an accepted vegetable three years ago. Plus, I figure that school meals are my only guaranteed ones for a while. And if Ryan keeps coming over to my apartment, I’ll never find time to look for a job. I’m still thinking about how to avoid inviting Ryan to my apartment when the bell rings. I get up after saying bye to Ryan and go to toss my things in the trash can nearest me. As I’m walking away, I spot a familiar jacket. The girl from the field outside of town is here right now.